what makes a narcissist tick after break up

Mine ALWAYS talked about exs and compared me to them EVERY SINGLE DAY. Good that you see him for the pos that he is. 3. Somehow I want him to come back, not the idealizing fake person he was in the beginning but this sinister asshole I have come to know. Especially if I have to pay child support. Basically I feel like he will always have a foothold in my life, because of my son, I feel he planned this entire situation strategically, and I feel so lost, alone, and empty that Im deeply afraid that he will use my son to destroy me forever. Previously, they shut down their softer feelings altogether, which is why their partners find them lacking both in empathy and emotional accessibility. He texted me he had a meltdown of his mind of me, I was his goddess and he was stupid, he was loved and happy with me, we were amazing together and we look so great together. A psychological evaluation was conducted during our last custody case and he was found to have a Personality Disorder with narcissistic, paranoid, and anti-social traits. My heart breaks when i think of all the effort i put into loving a vain guy whod do no effort to keep me. She almost had me convinced it was me responsible. I than left, and he started full pursuit again. But today my husband and all my family are happy again. Shitshows at the bar, parking lots, in the car. When the ob announced that my baby was a boy my babys dad said, A boy! Isgho Votre ducation notre priorit . Then I find out hes married. Id like to hear if your ex contacted you. Half the time,its the women who are the narcs. Try to remain calm and assertive. Grandiose narcissists are arrogant, dominant and extroverted. My roommate said he seemed a bit odd. It took me many times to get here. That is not always the case. Thank you for the great info and strength to stay no contact.. But its so hard and I really dont want to. Narcissists never go quietly into the night. This could be anything from buying flowers and showing at their partner's doorstep to offering expensive jewelry and a romantic trip. I was so blinded by my narc. When I reacted to him playing this terrible mind game, he was eerily calm. I put, together a vision board with pictures of us when we were happy and also, cards and letters he had written. The word Pornography is not a curse word last I checked. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. You cant make this shit up. The narcissist will deal with the 'downs' of the break up by creating a cycle wherein it is followed by the 'ups' of getting back together. That marriages do get bored sometimes and a man needs a new excitement, something new and sometimes younger.It is ironic that he had sexual issues, and use to say that is because he had move had sex in along time, but I figure that his marriage was bad because he could not perform and his wife probably thought he was not interested on her and because he could not per form at home, she probably felt at easy, but he used Viagra with me and he would go on for hours. She has called & left messages on my phone a couple times since hes been gone. Whats Ever to isolate me. Long story short, this narcissistic woman is my first love. I had also blown up at him in an angry way a couple times, which resulted in blocking me on FB. By saying this, they try to tear you down to make themselves feel better. A few weeks later, we were dating. until a friend of mine Walt Pen told me about a spell caster who helped him in the same problem too. TMI and he never told me about that or her. As children, because they couldnt get the warmth, care, validation, or support from their caretakers, they concluded that they werent good or worthy enough to warrant them. Thats not to say no contact is a bad idea though; if communication continued after you broke up with them, they would almost certainly lure you back in. I promise you it is worth it. Get up and make a change, right now, just do it and dont stop trying. Like how could someone do someone who had great intentions so badly??? Ju gets very upset with me when I bring my ex in the pic and that day, I called him to visit my son at the hospital. You can;t get him out. long story short he got me arrested then bail him his mum n sis. I told him I will not accept child support. Nope. They are not able to regulate their emotions or consider the impact that their actions may have on other people. It's easy to assume once the breakup is initiated, your nightmare . 1. he needs protecting .get a stable income or if on welfare provide evidence of your not struggling and budgeting for u and child. And she knew she has tempers but shes changed for the sake of keeping the family together. I am unemployed, living with a friend and he depleted my account. Tried to be ridiculously pragmatic about me moving out and diving up the things ( didnt want to discuss anything about the relationship, just bills, details). These websites with very little scientifical background are dangerous and can ruin peoples lives. This article is so spot on. You can do this too! Not its wrong. Karaoke. let your ex play whatever game he can dont fall for the manipulation the love bombing co parent and if he refusing make sure you have it all on writing do not go back! He said : I need to eat! And how hes single. Theres a BIG difference between a narcissistic ex and a regular exthe difference starts at the very beginning of the relationship.. And trust me its like gastro, if you dont know if youve had it, you havent. If there are kids involved on communicate when absolutely needed. However, many narcissists take the approach of acting like nothing ever happened. Its mostly females replying to all these types of articles so really its only males to have this behaviour patten ?! I know what I am reading here is true, and I need a game plan. His mama is also a pos. We stopped to dinner on the way and later, I had the best sex I had ever experienced on that little bed in the back cab of the truck. This has saved me loads of pain, and probably my life. Maybe the word is thrown around too much,not all break ups are because of narcissistic abuse, but too many are these days! Well that gave him even more power supply. So after my daughter told me that tonight, I texted him and told him to come get his car and the rest of his belongings out of my yard. It was the anniversary of my moms passing. He fed off my reaction to the things he would say to me, he thrived for my responses or me arguing back with him, etc. It might seem selfish of me to some of you but others who understand what i was in, can tell that just letting her do would be foolish because never again will i find someone like her. Doing to others to try to jump ship at this point I feel like I need him. Seeing me upset his reaction was Im damned if I do and damned if I dont! This is the well-known narcissistic injury, which has provided the focal point for many writers seeking to characterize the phenomenon of pathological narcissism. Im Mentally & physically broken down. Just stay away from the narc! This broke my heart in pieces. Deep down, clinging desperately not simply to a positive but grandiose sense of self, theyre compelled at all costs to block out any negative feedback about themselves.. So, he left me devastated and without the ability to earn a living. You cannot break something that was neve. Im so tired emotionally. We met each other families and everyone told us we were perfect for each other. A narcissist aims to show off a 'better' replacement. just focus on now and present and if he tries to focus on the past you dont live there la use the past cannot be unchanged its what you do going forward the changes also learn to be emotionally intelligent and when triggered learn to process respond not react work on this they hate that trust me but dont get big headed focus on the plan and Ur child. com)))))). Its so awesome to breathe again. If he wants to sign his rights away completely I would be willing to do so. I recall reaching my arms around him, and after that I completely blacked out, I woke up the next morning completely nude and wrapped in my comforter. Its a very viscous type of demon and its best to run! I really dont know anyone thats happy with kids. I found out the day after the breakup and went totally No Contact. We talk about lot of scientific and pseudo classifications in terms of narcissist-sociopathic inflictions , however we often fail to introspect. So if theyre to feel safe in the context of an intimate relationship, they need to keep their partner at a distance. they voluntarily gave up their humanity. He would try to bully me and my children so much that we all were literally walking on egg shells. he didnt bond with our baby and at 9 weeks post partum i left his homje with my baby black and blue for saying the wrong thing. Just accepted it. More often, the narcissist will go silent for some period of time, and then return as if nothing happened. I had to get a restraining order. So when theyre unable to get outward adulation, they can collapse from within. And I finally blocked him. Many of them, in their desperate attempts to convince others of their superiority, are highly motivated to achieve much more than most people; this will give them something to really brag about. Six weeks since I ESCAPED from A Nacc Am 57 wt 4 grown kids and a nana.8 yrs ago my 3rd husband past away. I became so emotionally stressed that I literally couldnt think straight, I constantly cried many many nights, my hair literally fell out in clumps. 4. Shes going to have a nice ass and lips. This was quite disturbing to me and I confronted him. This is caused from the damage done over a dozen years of emotional abuse from my ex. But most of us who have lived with a N for a long time, whether we are still engaged of recovered, dont need to focus on how the N feels. Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. After reading all these,I decided to give it a try. 32 years of hell. My situation was similar. Yes, I have said gay, and all of the above as you have stated. thanks to Prophet Clark for saving my relationship and for also saving others own too. Ex husbandnot a narcissist..ex boyfriend DEFINITELY a narcissist. Youre once again the shiny source of narcissistic supply, ready to be idealized, devalued, and discarded all over again. And I start getting angry emails texts about where Im at. This not only gives them an enormous sense of power, but it also weakens you mentally and emotionally. there were up and downs.. mostly it was hell. That is, the feelings are being projected outwardly onto other people or things. Then following day he tells me at breakfast that he still sees the woman, he is planning to break up off all contact, they are just friends, but knows he must do it in order to have a life with me.